Christian singles are more confused today than ever, when it comes to building relationships. Let’s say you found an incredibly good-looking person who seems to be sharing your values. Both of you feel the attraction building up and you think you are ready for a first date. It’s important to understand that now isn’t the time to make the decision. Considering these 10 dating tips for Christian singles might save you a lot of time and heartbreak.
It’s very difficult to think straight when passion overcomes you. There is one important thing you need to decide before you go on that date, and that is: what your limits will be.
Don’t be unequally yoked
As a Christian, you surely have a very strong and important relationship with Christ. At times it’s possible to feel attracted to a person who doesn’t feel close to God and doesn’t have the strong bond with Christ you have. If you let yourself date this person, you are playing with fire. What will happen if you fall in love? What will you do if you marry this person, how are you going to raise your children together if you don’t have the same beliefs?
Take 2 Cor. 6:14 seriously.
Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? (NLT)
Put on the armor of God daily
Today’s world requires you to get all the help you can possibly have. Are you spending enough time with God? Do you believe and depend on Him to acknowledge and meet your needs of security and love? You will be able to resist any temptation thrown your way if you have the whole armor of God around you at all times. (Eph. 6:10-20)
Obedience over passion
Usually, not everything we do right feels good at the moment of doing. In fact, it is quite the opposite. Giving into passion feels incredibly good. But you need to put the authority of Christ before your physical drives. Society keeps telling you to give into the moment, but don’t fall for this trap, for Christ tells you to be obedient to His world.
Appropriate physical expression
Physical intimacy must correspond with love and commitment. However, this doesn’t mean you can do anything you want if you are engaged. Physical touch should always be in the context of a close, meaningful relationship between two people. You should never reduce physical intimacy to mere satisfaction of personal need.
Mutually set limits
Both partners should have their own limits and they should take responsibility for setting them. If you both keep your boundaries you will reflect maturity into the relationship.
Always examine your personal motives
What’s your motivation for establishing a romantic relationship with another person? Is it power and control; is it maybe gratifying your ego, or meeting a selfish need? Do you crave genuine affection? Think it through, always.
Is there too much physical and too little spiritual?
If you feel that social, emotional and spiritual dimensions just don’t seem to appear when you talk to this person, you are clearly out of balance. If you can’t stand the things this person says, thinks or does, but you still crave a physical relationship with them, you need to stop yourself before you make a big mistake.
Less is always better
If you are uncomfortable with any kind of a physical expression, you shouldn’t do it just to make your partner happy. Likewise, never push your date to do anything they aren’t comfortable with, just to satisfy your own needs.
Let love guide you, not lust
Operate in love, not lust. Lust takes over you and takes away your ability to obtain control over your actions and feelings. Love is the fruit of the Spirit. Self-control comes from love. Always embrace love, never give in to lust.
Let the Holy Spirit lead you
If you ever feel convicted for certain behaviors, stop doing them immediately.